#17 - Dr Ross Greene on Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS) for School Can’t

Audio Brief

Show transcript
This episode explores Dr. Ross Greene's Collaborative and Proactive Solutions model for addressing challenging child behaviors, particularly school refusal. There are four key takeaways from this discussion. First, shift from managing behavior to solving the underlying problems causing it. Second, prioritize empathy, as the child's perspective is critical for understanding their challenges. Third, ensure solutions are mutually satisfactory, addressing both child and adult concerns. Finally, use "Plan C" to strategically prioritize problems by temporarily setting aside less critical expectations. The foundational principle of the CPS model is "kids do well if they can." This means challenging behaviors are not due to a child's unwillingness, but rather unmet expectations because they lack necessary skills or face unsolved problems. The goal is to identify and resolve these underlying issues rather than simply controlling the behavior. The process begins with the Empathy step, central to the CPS model's "Plan B" approach. Adults must actively listen to the child's perspective, gathering crucial information about what makes it difficult for them to meet expectations. This insight is vital for moving beyond blame towards effective problem-solving. Following the Empathy step, adults articulate their concerns regarding the unsolved problem. The final "Invitation step" involves collaboratively brainstorming solutions. For a solution to be durable and effective, it must realistically address the concerns of both the child and the adult. The CPS model introduces "Plan C" as a strategic tool for prioritization. This involves temporarily putting less critical expectations on hold, allowing focus on more pressing issues. This isn't "giving in," but a conscious decision to reduce stress and apply collaborative energy where it is most needed. Ultimately, the Collaborative and Proactive Solutions model empowers adults and children to work together, transforming challenging behaviors into opportunities for skill development and shared problem resolution.

Episode Overview

  • Dr. Ross Greene introduces his Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) model as a framework for helping children who are struggling with school attendance.
  • The core philosophy is a shift away from focusing on the behavior (school refusal) and towards identifying and solving the specific, underlying problems that prevent a child from meeting an expectation.
  • The podcast details the three practical steps of the CPS model: the Empathy step, the Define Adult Concerns step, and the Invitation step, emphasizing that solutions must be mutually satisfactory.
  • It provides strategies for parents to regulate their own emotions, use creative communication methods, and partner effectively with schools to implement solutions.
  • The concept of "Plan C" is introduced as a strategic way to prioritize problems by temporarily putting less critical expectations on hold.

Key Concepts

  • "Kids Do Well If They Can": This is the foundational belief of the CPS model. When a child isn't meeting an expectation (like attending school), it's not due to a lack of motivation but because they lack the skills or are facing unsolved problems.
  • Problem vs. Behavior: The model distinguishes between a child's challenging behavior (the symptom) and the unsolved problems causing that behavior (the root cause). The goal is to solve the problem, which in turn resolves the behavior.
  • The Three Steps of Plan B: This is the collaborative process for solving problems:
    1. The Empathy Step: Gathering information by listening to the child's perspective to understand what is making it difficult for them to meet an expectation.
    2. The Define Adult Concerns Step: The adult shares their concerns about the unsolved problem, explaining how it affects the child or others.
    3. The Invitation Step: Collaboratively brainstorming solutions that are realistic and mutually satisfactory, addressing the concerns of both the child and the adult.
  • Proactive Problem Solving: The most effective time to solve problems is proactively when everyone is calm, not reactively in the heat of the moment.
  • Plan C (Prioritizing Problems): A strategic decision to temporarily put a specific expectation on hold. This is not "giving in" but a way to reduce stress and focus on solving higher-priority problems first.
  • Partnering with Schools: Schools are essential partners in solving school-related issues. The ideal approach is to frame the interaction as a non-blaming partnership focused on helping the child.

Quotes

  • At 1:37 - "Well, um, the biggest shift that's involved in the CPS model is we're not particularly focused on a kid's behavior. We're focused on the problems that are causing the behavior." - Dr. Greene explains the primary paradigm shift of the CPS model.
  • At 3:17 - "A big theme of the CPS model is 'kids do well if they can'." - Dr. Greene shares the foundational belief that children are not willfully misbehaving but are lacking the skills to meet expectations.
  • At 8:31 - "This problem will not be solved unless we have a solution that addresses the concerns of both parties." - He explains that for a solution to be durable, it must be mutually satisfactory and address the needs of both the child and the adult.
  • At 24:09 - "That information from the kid is critical. Otherwise, we're still guessing and often still blaming." - This quote encapsulates the core philosophy that moving from blame to problem-solving requires getting accurate information directly from the child.
  • At 32:38 - "The kid isn't meeting the expectation anyway, so all we're really doing is making it official..." - He explains the logic behind "Plan C" (putting an expectation on hold), reframing it as a strategic acknowledgment of the current reality rather than a passive act of giving up.

Takeaways

  • Shift your focus from managing a child's behavior to collaboratively solving the underlying problems that are causing it.
  • Always start with empathy; the child is the primary source of information about what is getting in their way, and you cannot find a durable solution without first understanding their perspective.
  • A problem is only truly solved when the solution is realistic and addresses the concerns of both the child and the adult.
  • Be strategic and prioritize. Use "Plan C" to temporarily drop less critical expectations so you can focus collaborative energy on the most pressing issues.